Hannah Vs. La Cucaracha

A few days ago, I came out into the darkened kitchen for a glass of water and saw a suspiciously shaped, dark figure scuttle along the door of our under-sink cabinet.  It froze for a split-second as I flicked on the lights and that's all the time it took for me to realize that we had a bonafide German cockroach in the house. It was fairly small, so I made up a story in my head that it was probably just a rebellious teenage runaway cockroach, no family of thousands waiting just behind the wall.  I hoped it would be off to another stoop as soon as it realized we're not junk food junkies, or at least that I had frightened it away for a while.

But:  two days later, I came home from work to find the little stinker hanging out on my counter.  It was a quickdraw to-the-death as I reached for the Lysol spray bottle (with bleach√) while managing to keep both eyes on the Bug.  I don't generally like using such harsh chemicals, even for cleaning, but I had heard that Cockroaches survived the fall of the dinosaurs and the last major ice-age and I was taking no chances.  If he was going to be eradicated, Lysol had to be my weapon.  He saw me place a steady finger on the purple trigger and take aim, and he ran for cover.  As he ducked behind the stash of tea and the wooden cutting boards on our counter, I used my free hand to create a barricade.  He had nowhere to go but back out in plain sight.  He took a running leap for the sink but my aim was perfect.  I sprayed a dozen blasts as he kept struggling against the current of the Lysol river that had formed along the counter's edge and the wall.  I couldn't believe he was still moving!  He was back-paddling as I continued to disinfect him.  When the thrill of victory was mine and I had him in a ziplock baggie, I felt the slightest bit sad for the guy -- but letting one cucaracha take up residence is like offering to build a miniature Dubai for pests!  So, rest in peace my fellow scrapper.  I hope you didn't have children (for your sake, and mine).

"I know, I know!  'Twas The Cockroach, in The Kitchen, with The Lysol!  I've done it!  I've won Clue®!"